WOW!
more then 1 solid year since i posted! WAhahaha wonder how many people still visit my blog!?
Well guess what~! this IS the blue moon and i am going to do a post. =)
Firstly, lets start things off with "change". What changed since my last post?
Personally, there are too much going ons to blab about and i am just going to list the more important phases of my life in point form.
1. I graduated from my poly
2. I am going into the army very soon (July 10th)
3. I coach many new people from my kickboxing club and is going for my black belt on 31st may
4. I worked for a event company known as Procon and handled several events mainly for BMW, StarHub and Canon
5. I am going taiwan soon! =)
6. Many more which I am either too lazy to list or too unimportant to note (and some that i forgot =P)
yadaa yada... lets see.. you must be thinking why the hell do i start posting again in this abandoned blog after such a long time? Well, even i do not know.. but i believe it may be due to the topic i started.. "change" ..
Why change? Recently i found that my view of life and the things around me to be somewhat different. Not once had i planned for the future. My life had been a comfortable one. My parents looked after me; money was never a real big problem (we are not rich but enough for a roof and food to eat) etc etc etc... perhaps this was what most of us singaporean teenagers felt.
You know, being the only son in the family with siblings of a wide age gap does makes a difference in my level of maturity. I was always taken care off.. so much so that i merely took it for granted. I am 20 years old now.. 1/4 of my life gone and i am still having mentality of a kid. Now that both my sisters are married to the guy they love, the noisy family of 5 is now reduced to 3..
Age is creeping up my parents like vines on a fence.. my dad is having a lot of financial difficulties and my poor mom is working her arse off at a cafe by washing cups and dishes to carry her share of burden. Sometimes.. my heart really aches to see them like this.. i am not good with emotions nor am i excellent with words of comfort. To the world, i looked as if i cannot be bothered.. but deep down i really do.
Finally perhaps, i am tasting the feel of life. I must declare, first, that i am still within my comfort zone and is not yet challenging life. But i had been thinking quite a bit lately. It is sooner or later, that i will be on my own. Am i ready to face life's challenges if everyone is to leave me right now? Will i still lead the comfortable life i have right now if my parents could no longer support me? I know the answer straight away and it is a NO.
Most of my thoughts go to solving the problem of money. IF i want to sustain my comfortable life, how am i going to support my aging parents, the house, or start a new family altogether? Do i have enough financial intelligence to make money work for me? ... I am an individual who love to dream. I dreamt that i would be someone of status, someone living in a beautiful apartment with my family, someone driving a luxury sports sedan, someone travelling around the world, someone who is something to this world. I yearn to be known.
Look if you think that i am a materialistic person, i totally agree.
Why? because i belive money is power. A power to do thinks that many cannot. Not only the power to fulfill my life's desire and dreams but also the power to look after my love ones, the power of security, the power of putting food on the table for the family, the power of making them happy, and yes, even the power for better health. (if you cant think why health then jus take a look at a poor dude who suffers from poor health and one who is rich enought to seek medical treatment)
My dad is almost 60. He has diabeties and rely heavily on medication. He is the family's sole breadwinner and will retire within a couple of years. so what then?
it will be my turn to take over.
So what had i planned to solve this problem? Well, i am giving myself 2 years while in the army, to come up with a business plan. At this point of time you would probably stop me and say "WAIT! aren't you going to further your studies?" My answer would be, furthering my studies will be my last choice.
You may think that i am crazy, that i cant survive in this world where a certificate matters so much, that i will never find a well paying job, that i can never compete my the people around me, that my level of intelligence will lose to those who got a PhD.
Say hello to the typical singaporean mindset. Why not i tell you this, that i never intended to find a "well paying job" nor i intend to compete with all the employees and i don't even give a damn about masters or Phd? What if i say,"Why do i have to fight for jobs when i can create them?", "Why can't i get all the people who studied so hard, and use their knowledge to work for me?", "Why must i earn a stable income if i can earn much more?", "Why cant i be the employer instead of an employee?", "Why must i work for money and not let my money work for me?.
Our parents kept telling us the importance of education, our government tells us that, the people around us repeat whatever was said, so much so that it is a perception drilled into our head. I agree that study is important, but not the sort of education thought in schools.
I believe that education is a life's journey and it should be taught by experience and not solely by textbooks or lecturers who don't know a damn about the outside world but claim that the world "IS what they claimed, it WAS". Why do i say that? Because i felt that these lecturers who teach from textbooks or experience are not updated enough. My term in poly allowed me to see teachers who give the same example to all their students over and over again, year after year, that they failed to realise that what they were saying were 5 or even 10 years old. How could you call an experienced teacher to be "experienced" like that? Unless of cos it is a skill that is being taught. *(I am studying business)
Therefore to me, education and knowledge comes from the things I did and is going to do. I will only further my studies if i cannot think of a good business plan. At least i have an alternative route to take.
So that is my change in mentality - plans for the future...
Now lets talk about people and life.
Friends come and friends go. During my term in poly i met some wonderful people, as well as those who irritate me like hell. Life i mentioned previously, i am not a real "people's person". I tend to make alot of people dislike me, until they knew me better.
I felt a lot of change in personalities of the people i knew. Let us distort the "not-so-close" ones and talk about those who are more dear to me. My friends since secondary school days changed abit. i feel the group's bond getting weaker and meet ups are lesser. But then again this may be due to the packed schedule everyone have. I will be going in within 2 months to experience it myself.
My friends in poly i never really get use to. Perhaps it is the clash of personality. I never felt easy or fun around them. I feel different. They are ok friends but deep down i know we will not keep in touch after a few months. Already we had not gone out together since a month ago, or chatted even over the internet. Maybe i lacked the abilty to adept, or my EQ level is just too low. I know that my personally is not suited for every genre of people. I seem to be in either of 3 stages of experssion all the time - cant be bothered and lazy, serious or just being plain crazy.
Friend who is far away seem to have trouble with life and is not coping too well. This is not within my power to help save for emotional and mental support.
And the one dearest to me seemed to change as well. I felt quite low nowadays because we seemed to be getting bored of one another as conversational topics start to decline. Everyday felt like a routine.. we need something fresh..
So here comes the sudden end of my post. there are much much more that i liked to elaborate but either you as a reader will get too bored and catch no balls of what i am blabbing away because what i am typing now are my raw thoughts and that it is jumbled up in everyway or i will be tired to death because i only slept 2 hours yesterday and it is 230 in the morning already.
perhaps i will post again...
chao!
-Ron- rememberedd att` 12:51 AM
Sunday, April 29, 2007
i feel graatte!!
My attachment offically ended yesterday and i completed my 1500+ words report weeks ago hahaha... my colleagues are wonderful!! almost the entire week my lunch was "bao-ed" haha and they even brought me to a buffet dinner and treated me to a pub yesterday ^^
I shall upload the pics as soon as im able to get hold of them.. anyway, i achieved 1 thing today! that is i am now an assistant coach for my kickboxing group!! yeep~! i jus got my blue belt... next round would be brown .. then black! -drooll-..
anyway, cut long story short.. i got my driver's license, the card, yesterday haha.. after 2 weeks of mindless waiting, its finally here!! whee~! .. the face look ugly though but who cares!!
peace!
My new belt (top) and the fighters below..
My training kaki
My license! (alright i know i look like taxi uncle.. DUN LUFF *(#@(%@$!! )
-Ron- rememberedd att` 12:31 AM
Monday, April 16, 2007
I PASSED MY DRIVING WOHH OOO WOOHHOOOO WHOOOOOOOO!!!
hahhahaha... got full marks for my circuit.. but that fella docked of a couple of points on main road..
anyway!! drove to bedok today and back!! hahahaha... with my family of cos.. =P
DRIVING IS DAMN SONG! I LOVE DRIVING!! WAHAHA
-Ron- rememberedd att` 10:15 PM
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Wheeewww!!!
guess wad ppl!
i ALMOST got KILLED by lightning today..
yeah the damn lightning struck like 2 metres away from where i stand!!
its like so damn super fast la..
BOOM! and the shockwave followed in an instance... shutting down my MP3 and other eletrical appliances..
afew ppl around me got a huge shock too.. its really so damn loud and frightening lar...
heart beating like crazy after that...
damn .. life REALLY come and goes in such simple unimaginable ways... i was jus saying that over lunch this afternoon and this happens!!
bahhh.. made me wanna love everyone and everything around me even more jus in case touchwood.. hahaha..
but hey.. its really true u know.. jus imagine .. now you are probabily thinkin i am so healthy and strong.. i got so much future to look forward to .. i wanna do wad wad wad in future travel to where where where and i will live to a healthy age of 80 and die with 10 grand children to carry on your life line ...
next day BANG! ur hit by a car and die on the spot..
wahh.. dun even have time to tell how much u love everyone.. dun even have the time the write your will.. no last words no goodbye kisses.. you dun even know how u died.. everything jus turn from colourful to emptiness.. no sound .. no light .. nothing..
or unless there really is a heaven and hell.. then let your guilt lead your soul.. hahaha..
damn..
So to all those of you who are dear to me! (you know who you are!!) to my love one.. to my family.. to my bros and my friends and the ones that i would sacrifice anything to protect..sorry for all the shit i caused.. i love you all man!! ..hehe
life is fragile and precious!!
SO YOU ALL BLOODY TREAT ME WELL I TELL YARHH!!! muahaha!!
=P
PEACE!
-Ron- rememberedd att` 8:54 PM
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
our relationship jus passed the 1 yr mark..
HURRAY TO THAT!
but booo to the small hassel we just had.. or I jus had.. wadever.. it pisses me off..
Why mus you ALWAYS do that? I remember telling you TONNS of times.. what may seem stupid to you may not be so to me and vice versa. I respected you by not doing what you do not like and maintained that sinced the promise. The fact that we had gone closer and sweeter nowadays DOES NOT MEAN that i can stand the same old shit.
Truth to be told, you HAD been constantly doing it.. not jus today.. i just tolerated and ren as much as i can. I may laugh at you; i may mock ... What u see as fun.. making me jealous.. pinching me or punching me or doing wadever u like.. i feel the pinch.. i accepted the punch.. i listern to all the shit..
but sometimes i felt sick..
i don;t mind the physical stuff .. 95% of the time i even felt its fun! .. but once too much its SERIOUSLY IRRITATING.. esp in shopping malls and stuff.. cant you jus behave and respect me as i respect you?
jus like how you dun like me pinching ur tummy.. i rarely did it now did I?
but all the verbal stuff.. u see, i never know about your life at that company.. you said you dun like to talk about it.. so i did not ask.. but the next thing i knew is that you met me at the IT fair with this very same guy that you went out with for tea and went thru all the trouble to do all those DVDs for you? yes he may be old.. short or ugly i dun care.. fact is, i am a guy and ugly as it is, i admit i do have some face i would like to upheld.
yes.. i may feel insecurity creeping up my sleeves once in awhile.. but thats because i absolutely do not know whats going on! I told u the gossips of my company.. i update you with the things i did.. but you? i really have no idea..
as much as i want to ask but not to look as though i am trying to probe.. i do hope that you will zhi dong chat up with me with simple topics like that..
i may have made you cried as much as i don;t want to.. (i apologise to this) but at least you can let it out..
imagine me having to bear all these in me.. because i had not shed a tear since years ago.. i felt the pressure sometimes .. pushing my eyeballs.. makin me wanna shout out loud.. but all i did was gulp at my own saliva to push all the ugly thoughts out of me.
I trusted you .. i really do .. but i admit, i still do not understand you a full 100%
nor do you to me..
alright i shall let this insanity rest..
love you..
-Ron- rememberedd att` 11:13 PM
Monday, March 05, 2007
So next up is my GF bdae (which is over) haha.. she had been reminding me for almost a year heh.. so i tried to make it as good as possible for her..
1st up is her present.. i bought her a essential oil burner..
My colleges all shouted "SO BORING!!" haha.. but i they din noe i had special messages for every different bottles of oils.. heh.. different essential oils have different "healing" property de mah.. so in every single bottle i actually made and attached a small tag.. like lavender is "I wanna be there with my dear if she cant fall asleep.." and corny things like that!! haha.. omg *SHY*!
haha.. so i met up with her after work.. oh! talk about work.. i was having an event held at the Mariott Hotel Level 3.. it kinda boring for me .. i find all the BIG and IMPT ppl there all wearing a plastic mask.. thats their real faces btw .. haha if u get wad i meant.. i see my boss smile like a little kid for the 1st time.. (he doesn't even know half of his company exist) .. yea that arrogant freak.. anyway, i was given the job of moving all the rubbish .. lucky for me, they also hired movers.. or how the hell am I gonna carry a 10-tonn LCD TV all by myself? hahaha.. alright im exaggerating..
Then its the end of the day in office apart from my hunt for my long sleeve shirt which the lovely aunties in the office hid away from me while i was at the event.. making me climb up and down only to find it in a box on my neighbour college's besk =_=
After leaving office then i met up with her to have dinner at a place that i had only been once and ate nothing.. hahaa.. its beside beach road.. a small indian-european feel sorta cafe that sells shesha (water smoke haha) lucky we went early and no one was smoking yet.. they gave us a place upstairs.. the ambience (was it spelt like this?) was excellent! .. the room had only 3 light sources.. so its kinda dimly lit.. and there are no seats at all.. they provide carpets, low tables and LOTS of pillows.. hahaha.. so its really kinda comfy.. as for food wise, well it seemed like we ordered the wrong appetizers hahaa.. its pure 100% rich yoghurt and some indian bread.. omg SUPER SOUR!!! hahaa... we had a really hard time finishing that!! however, the maincourses were quite excellent..
As we sat there and relax awhile, she unwraps her presents and we had quite alot of things to chat about haha... however, we left soon after another couple arrives... fat ang moh and fat chinese girl.. haha!! omg im sucha bitch.. hahaha..
I brought her to another place, jus a street away, to drink a surprisingly cheap and extreamly tasty teh ahlia! its Ginger teh tarek for those who does not know what that is.. that street there is filled with vintage motor scooters and voom voom cars like the Lancer Evolution and Subaru WRX!! damn.. *jealoused*
Nvm.. im destined to owned many different lumbos and ferraris in my lifetime..
HAH!
I sent her home after that and thats the end of my gf's bdae story =)
I am absolutely exhausted, impatient and wadever.. to wait for the ridiculously slow upload of pictures .. so i shall do them all in a go another day.. forthe time being, TATA~
Lemme see what i can remember next..
-Ron- rememberedd att` 11:21 PM
Saturday, March 03, 2007
wow.. sorry for this abandoned blog hehh!
Shopping centres revamp.. my blog oso mus revamp! although like not veh nice la.. but who cares hahaha..
Alright.. reason being that i am posting again all of a sudden is because my frenz complain i had not been updating!! GOSH! such honor .. din noe my blog was being visited frequently..
*SORRY FOR THE BHB & UGLY ME WIF THE DAMN SWORD!*
tadatada.. anyway.. lets see .. i shall start with abel's birthday.. thats as far as my memory can brings me back.. yeah ive been suffering alot of STM lately due to the boring and heavy load of rubbish work i have to do in office (IPP) every singly day..
So! abel san's birthday.. we met up at around 7pm (they were late for 1/2 hr) after work for dinner.. Tat and Kayly went out to shop for abel's present .. a nice vest! and we went kuishin bo at lvl 4... duno if i spelt correctly.. advertisment is don don don kuishin bo that wan la.. aya.. haha.. who cares.. the food are GREAT! .. free flow of sashimis.. snow crabs.. paper pots.. soft shell crabs.. damn .. thats life hahaha...
Everyone was damn high after the dinner.. around 9pm le mah.. so all the shops are closing or closed already.. we had lots of fun though..! sitting at kid's round-a-bout then we went pass this shop called "WHY PAY MORE!" that Tat shouted inside "WHY PAY MORE?! COS I GOT MONEY LEH!!!" then zhao hahaa and did that to several other shops.. hahaha..
cont again..
-Ron- rememberedd att` 12:39 AM